Why our courses won’t make you earn six-figures

Soz. We’re PROBABLY not going to make you rich beyond your wildest dreams so if you’re after that six-figure passive income, you’ve come to the wrong place. 

We can’t offer you this because, duh, we’re not rich either. There’s a reason we’re able to answer your emails at midnight and relate to your tales of sending pitches in the car while your kids are at swimming. Because we’re doing the same. 

We don’t know about you but there’s something particularly soul-sucking – not to mention highly dubious – about reading about how many thousands Mrs Shoulderpads has earned while eating her granola. “Why aren’t *I* earning megabucks while watching Friends??” we cry, “Where’s MY secret passive income??” “I must be a massive failure”. 

We’ll let you into a little secret. Anyone who can be arsed to write a blog post about earning a six-figure income probably isn’t earning a six-figure income. I mean, if you really were earning that much you’d be too busy rolling around naked in pound notes (they still make them, right?) and inhaling Cristal to want to commit to a daily noon webinar wouldn’t you? If we were earning that much, you lot could, frankly, fuck off. Webinars would be the LAST thing we’d want to do. We find telephone interviews hard enough work, for goodness’ sake. 

What we’re saying is that we take these things very much with a pinch of salt and you should too. Yes we know some highly successful businesspeople and most of them have worked bloody hard for it. And, guess what? They’re still working, not twatting about trying to get you to sign up to yet another soul-destroying, unattainable, envy-based dream. 

We’ve worked for years at the coalface of journalism and copywriting and we’re actually proud that we still do. We both still need to pitch regularly and we both know what it’s like to pull all-nighters to get features written or to send multiple invoice reminders while also hoping that shit payer employs you again. 

But we love what we do and this is why our courses work. They aren’t going to buy you a house in Outpost Estates (guess where Hazel spends most of her online downtime) but they are going to give you the skills you need to make a viable, sensible-figured living. Now, who fancies rolling around in some Greggs sausage rolls?